Businesses lose $4 billion annually due to employee absenteeism due to childcare problems. These issues are no laughing matter, but admit it–if you have no kids, chances are you’re a little jealous. Cindy, whose cubicle is across from yours, has been off at least three times this month because of her kid. Meanwhile, you can’t even sneak out for a decent smoke. It’s just not right.
Well, now you too can take a breather. Introducing one of the most shameless ways to get off scot free: The Office Kid.
For $19.95 (plus shipping), you get to pick the gender, name and ethnicity of your bundle of imaginary joy, who arrives in the form of a framed photo and a very realistic poorly-scribbled drawing you can use to decorate the office. Also included in the kit is a list of useful excuses to get out of just about anything–and for a little extra you get a fake doctor’s note, more artwork, and a picture of the kid’s sports team–with you Photoshopped right in!
Can’t you just see me with little Helvetica at the gun range?!
Yeah, me neither. Thank god for Office Kid and fabulous women who know how to call a workday quits early to brainstorm–over happy hour margaritas–about what really matters in life: having fun.
Photos by Karen and Sam.
