Welcome to a new column here on lalawag called Twits, a place where I (Alice) review and berate your 140 character or less masterpieces.
I’ll be looking each week off the official lalawag twit list, if you’d like to be included please let us know in the comments. If you’d like to be excluded please let us know so we can double up on your coverage.
Basically Sean tells me that most of you are horrible tweeters and really need a good smack. Since he is too “busy” and “nice” to do it right he has hired me to. Yes he is actually paying me to do this so I’m pretty sure that does make me a professional troll.
Fine by me, lets see what has the uppercrust of LA tech been up to this week.
Sean Percival hates people having cyberflirts:
whatever girl is flirting with @tonyadam on IM please stop so we can finish our conv. about upcoming events and SEO etc
Later his wife did the “I overheard this…” to inform Sean that he needs to look into some of those nose strips:
OH via wife: “you have a snoring problem that only surfaced after we got married, if I had known this going in…”Maybe if he spent less time passed out in his omgawesome desk chair Laurie wouldn’t wake up thinking a train was coming through the living room.
Alyssa Milano is pimping the shit out of some show:
I’m sitting here day dreaming about going to work on @RomChallenged. I can’t wait to start shooting.It’s about a group of friends that are “romantically challenged”. RT @SCB8: Sounds like fun! What’s the premise of the show? I’m going to need everyone’s help when “Romantically Challenged” premieres. Small window of opportunity for success. Since everyone’s already seen her boobs I’m not sure what the draw to watch it is, but hey, in 6 months when it comes out I’ll be sure to forget to watch.
Shira Lazar hates holiday spirit…
People that put decorations on their car- somewhat questionable… …unless it makes her the center of attention:
just performed summer lovin’ with my co-host at xmas party! i think i lost my voice trying to reach those notes AV Flox is either trying to write an Evanescence song or trying to sound deep. Either way, ewww:
Wallpaper Los Angeles in napkins covered in desperate songs–that’s how I love, in pixel and ink I hand over my flesh and my secrets, my skeletons, torments and truths, and hope that you’ll kiss them and put them to sleep.I can’t ask for anything. You’ll come on your own. In the meantime, I’ll wallpaper Los Angeles, write you these things and set them to sea. She’s like one of those girls you knew in college who wore a beret for no fucking reason, and quoted Emily Dickinson. Then she would drink all your Boone’s and cry about how she was so deep that no one understood her, and she doesn’t care if she IS alone forever, she won’t betray who she IS. You know, that girl.
Francisco Dao is still sitting around being a sexually frustrated loser:
Earlier tonight I was at a party with peeps about 50 years old. All I can say is I have seen the future and it is grim :( Everyone knows Social Media is a whole lot like High School but I’m hearing some SERIOUS H.S. drama now #DramaLikeASoapOpera Awesome and Bizarre – I just got a call from the restroom attendant at Bare Elegance strip club trying to buy my book For all the single guys out there…snatch her up before someone else does RT @iamlawless is this a good time to say I’m now single? That’s right. The Man Who Can’t Get Laid is giving you dating advice. How long has it been since he’s seen a vagina? Maybe he should email Flox.
Stayed tuned next week as I deface even more of your pointless ramblings!
